Samurai Pizza Cats: New Millenium


Episode 2: The Stranger

Written By Guido Cerviche

Rated PG13

[Cue Opening Sequence]

[Fade out on the title screen. The show opens with Speedy and Polly walking back to the parlor with Guido, Francine, Carla, and GB.]

Polly [to Francine]: So, how did you guys manage without us?

Francine: It was a bit of a struggle, but fortunately my cousin just moved over from New York. He's been helping us out.

Speedy: Your cousin?

Guido [disgusted] (w/ contempt): Yeah. Jefferson Manx, the self proclaimed "Love Machine". The guy's a hentai through and through.

Speedy: Sounds like you, Guido.

Guido: I know, that's why I don't like him.

[After walking for a while, they come to the parlor. Before they can open the door however, a young cat in a black T-shirt, blue shorts, and a Pizza Cat apron comes flying out the window w/ a red hand print on his face. Holding open the door is a young fox girl, who would be very pretty if her face wasn't contorted in rage.]

Girl [screaming]: JERK! PERVERT! LEAVE ME ALONE!! [She runs from the parlor, stepping on the young cat's face as she goes.]

GB: Up to your old tricks, huh Jefferson?

Jefferson [in pain]: Damn that hurt! [Looks up and sees Polly] Oooh yeah! [Leaps to his feet.] Hey there, pretty lady. What's a sexy thing like you, doing with a bozo like this? [gestures to Speedy]

[The result is rather predicable. Polly delivers a high kick to his face that sends him flying back into the parlor to impact into far wall.]

Polly [pissed off]: That "bozo" is my husband.

Jefferson [in even more pain than before]: Oh. Thank you for that untimely information...

Speedy: Don't worry. She would've done the same thing if she were still single.

[Polly and the others nod in agreement. As they walk in, Francine peels him off the wall.]

Francine: You'll get used to him eventually. He'd hit on me if we weren't related.

Jefferson: Actually, Francine I believe we're only second cousins. If you ever wanted to we could-

Francine: Stop right there Jeff, before I puke. [glares at him] By the way, you didn't scare that poor girl off before she had a chance to pay, did you?

Jefferson: No, Fran. I swear! Here! [Hands her a wad off cash.]

Francine [taking the wad and patting him on the head]: Good boy. We don't want a repeat of your first day here, do we?

Jefferson [wincing in pain at the memory]: Of course not. I promise THAT will never happen again.

Speedy [to GB]: So, GB how did you and Carla enjoy Paris?

GB [in a bad French accent, grinning]: Well, let's just say zat Paris eezn't called ze city of lovers for nothing!

Polly [grinning]: I take it you two had as much fun as we did.

Carla [giggling]: Oui oui!

Francine [yelling]: Hey, let's go lovebirds! I want you guys back on the clock NOW!

Speedy [groaning, as he walks by Guido]: We gotta get her a new boyfriend.

Francine: I HEARD THAT!

[Speedy clams up and runs in. Guido stands there looking uneasy.]

Guido [pauses for a moment]: Hey Fran, I just remembered I promised to take Lucille out to the movies tonight.

Francine [annoyed]: Alright, just this once. But be back at a reasonable hour, cause you're not getting any time off tomorrow.

[Nodding, Guido runs out the door. The rest of the evening progresses as normal. Well, relatively normal in any case. Eventually night rolls around and everyone goes to bed. Cut to Guido's room, later that night. Guido is frantically holding the pillow over his head, trying to drown out the noise from Speedy and Polly's room, right next to his. {Aside from not being able to see them, he might as well be in the same room. We're talking rice paper walls here.} Finally, he bangs on the wall.]

Guido: Hey, can you two take a cold shower? Some of us are trying to sleep!

Speedy (embarrassed): Sorry!

[Silence follows, and sleep soon comes to all within the parlor. Cut to the Pizza Parlor, the next day. Speedy and Polly are flirting with each other while the others look on in shock.]

Guido: I gotta admit, marriage has brought out a side of Polly I never saw before.

[The phone rings and Francine answers it. Jefferson taps Polly on her shoulder and says something to her. What follows is "the Smack Heard 'Round the World", which results in Jefferson leaving another imprint in the wall beside the one he made yesterday.]

GB [wincing]: That's more like the Polly we know.

[Polly comes storming by, with Speedy following in hot pursuit.]

Carla: What did he say?

Polly [very pissed off]: Don't ask.

Speedy [also very annoyed, to Jefferson]: Really man, that was uncalled for. Not to mention disgusting.

Jefferson [in much pain]: Hey, I was just curious. [Grumbling to himself] Man, she really needs to loosen up!

Polly: God, why must I constantly be surrounded by perverts?

Speedy (affectionate): Must be the curse of great beauty.

[Polly looks at him and smiles. Their attention, however, is soon diverted to Francine.]

Francine [to the person on the phone]: Wait a second, let me get this straight. You want 10 Deluxe Pizzas, 10 Catbird specials, and 10 orders of garlic breadsticks with extra spicy dipping sauce, and you want it delivered by Polly Esther? [pause] Well, no. It's just that we don't normally get requests for a specific delivery person- [pause] No, no, of course I don't want to lose a customer. [pause] Alright, alright. It's a deal. [hangs up] Did you guys hear that?

Speedy: It's gotta be a trap. Whoever it was probably knew Francine would never pass up an order like that.

Polly: All the more reason for me to go. If we can figure out who's trying to trick us, and why, we can get the drop on them before they get us.

Speedy [authoritatively]: No way. They obviously want you to go. I'm not going to let you play right into their hands.

Polly [annoyed]: Speedy, I can take care of myself.

Speedy: Then I'm going with you.

Polly [voice rising]: No! I don't need a babysitter!

[Speedy starts to argue but decides better. He figures she's probably right. After all Polly is a pretty tough girl. Besides, he doesn't want to spoil their first few months of marriage by getting into a fight with her.]

Speedy [kissing her passionately]: Just make sure you make it back, ok?

Polly: I promise.

[The order, naturally, is quite heavy. This is not a problem for Polly, but it does prevent the order from being delivered via the cannon. Thus, Polly is forced to walk to the address on the order slip, which doesn't do much for her stamina. She finally arrives, and knocks on the door. A figure in a dark blue robe answers. His hood is up, covering his face.]

Polly: Hi, your food is here.

[Wordlessly, the figure pulls a dagger from his belt and lunges at her. She takes out her own dagger and parries his blow. The fight continues with a series of parries, lunges, thrusts, and slashes from both sides. Finally, Polly trips the figure up. He falls to the ground and Polly crouches over him, holding her dagger at his throat.]

Polly: You'll have to do better than that.

[The figure seems to grin wickedly. Out of the shadows steps a large, bull-like robot. Polly tries to fight it off, but is quickly overpowered. It holds her in a full nelson, immobilizing her. The cloaked figure produces a syringe filled with cloudy liquid. He injects the liquid into Polly's neck, and white fire dances through her body. Eventually, she loses consciousness and the bioroid flings her limp body over its shoulder. Grabbing the food with the other hand, it follows the cloaked figure back into the warehouse.]

[Cut to inside the warehouse. The robot and hooded figure walk to the center of the warehouse. A small circular platform appears beneath their feet and lowers itself into the floor. Underground there is a huge laboratory. The figure steps off, followed by the bioriod. Walking out of the shadows, approaching the hooded one, is Seymour "Big" Cheese.]

BC: You got her. Excellent.

[The figure pulls down the hood of his robe. It's Roland Crow.]

Roland: What did I tell you. Piece of cake.

Jerry [stepping forward, beside Cheese]: I'm glad to see you still know where your loyalties are, Roland.

Roland: Like I told you Master Atric, the crows and I are behind you first and foremost.

BC: Are you sure nobody saw you?

Roland: I did an infrared sweep of the area. There was no one there but me, Tauros [gestures to the bull], and the Pizza Witch.

Jerry: Good work, Roland. You may leave now. Tell no one of our arrangement, and make sure the crows are ready to move on our say so.

Roland: As you wish, Master Atric. [Exits the way he came, leaving Polly for Cheese and Atric. Tauros is busy devouring the food.]

BC: All right then, Jer. Let's get her up on the operating table.

Jerry [as they lift Polly onto the table]: I have to admit Cheesy, this plan is so simple it's downright fiendish!

BC: Yes, I'm sorry I didn't come up with it sooner.

[Cheese grins evilly and his eyes glow red. Fade to black.]

[Cut to an exterior shot of the Pizza Parlor. At the bottom of the screen appear the words "Three Weeks Later". Cut to inside the Parlor. Everyone inside looks emotionally drained. Speedy seems especially dead. He's holding a bottle of sake` and his eyes are bloodshot. Everyone jumps as the phone rings. Speedy answers it. It's Big Al.]

Speedy: Hi, Al.

Big Al: Hi, Speedy. How's everyone holding up?

Speedy: About as well as can be expected. How's the investigation coming?

Big Al: There's just no trail. We searched that warehouse she went to a thousand times, but there's nothing there.

Speedy: What about some sort of hidden annex, underneath the warehouse? Cheese and Fat Bunny always had underground hideouts.

Big Al: We looked for signs of that, but there were no entrances or secret passageways that we could find. It's a very frustrating case, Speedy.

Speedy: I want to be out there, Al. I want to help look for her.

Big Al: Speedy, you know I can't let you do that.

Speedy [getting frustrated]: Al, I'm not just some poor shmuck whose wife was kidnapped. I'm a Samurai Pizza Cat. I know I can help.

Big Al: I'm not questioning your abilities, Speedy. The fact is you're too close to this case. Hell, I'm too close. [pauses] Captain Mizuno is a fine officer, and she and her men are working 'round the clock. I understand your frustration, but there isn't much more we can do.

Speedy (softly): It doesn't make any sense. We haven't even received a ransom call. [squeezes his eyes shut as tear begin to well up] I shouldn't have let her go. **sobs** She's so damn stubborn- [breaks down in hysterics]

Big Al: Speedy, it's not your fault. You can't blame yourself.

[Speedy continues to cry, but softens up a little.]

Big Al: I'll call you if anything turns up.

Speedy [calming down]: Thanks Al. **sobs** I'll talk to you later.

[Speedy hangs up the phone. He sits down in a chair and takes a long gulp of sake`. Lucille goes over to comfort him.]

Lucille: It's ok, Speedy. We're here for you. [As Speedy continues to cry, Lucille begins to as well.]

Guido [to Francine]: This might not be the best time to say it, but thank goodness she left her missiles at home.

[Francine glares at him, but silently agrees. On top of everything they were going through, they did not need to get blown up as well.]

Francine: Poor Speedy.

Jefferson: Yeah. I don't blame him. If I were married to a hottie like Polly, I'd be torn up too.

[Speedy glares at him just as the phone rings. He answers it.]

Speedy: What is it Al?

[The voice that answers is not Big Al's.]

Voice: Speedy Cerviche?

Speedy: Yes, who is this?

Voice: Never mind that. We have your wife.

Speedy: Listen you bastards, if you've done anything to Polly-

Voice: Your wife is fine, for now. And if you want her to be returned unharmed, you will do exactly what we say. Meet us by the Great Comet Caper Memorial, with 10,000 dollars in Little Tokyo currency. We'll meet you there.

Speedy: Let me talk to her. I want to make sure she's ok.

Voice: You may speak to her, when she has been returned to you. Not a minute sooner. And come alone. If we see just one beat cop with you, you can start making funeral arrangements. [hangs up]

Speedy: Hello? Hello?! [slams the phone down]

Lucille: Speedy, was that the kidnappers?

Speedy: Yeah. They want 10,000 dollars.

Guido: That's strange. Why did they wait so long to call?

Speedy: To terrorize us, probably. [The phone rings again. Speedy answers.] Did you get that Al?

Big Al: Yes we did, Speedy. Unfortunately whoever it was, was smart enough to scramble the trace. We couldn't tell where it was coming from.

Speedy (disappointed): Damn. So, then I guess I have to make the drop.

Big Al: Yeah. Speedy, I'm sending Captain Mizuno and some of her men along to back you up.

Speedy: You can't do that Al. They said they'd kill Polly if I didn't come alone.

Big Al: Speedy for all we know this could be another trap, designed to capture you like they captured Polly. We don't even know if she's still alive.

Speedy (upset): If she is, you'll be putting her life in danger!

Big Al: Please, Speedy. I promise they will remain out of sight. The kidnappers won't know they're there until Polly has been handed over.

Speedy [thinks for a moment]: O-okay, Al. Just make sure they canít be seen.

Big Al: You have my word.

[Once again, Speedy hangs up the phone. Cut to later, by the Memorial. Speedy is there, with a briefcase filled with money. He waits. Suddenly, a huge van speeds towards him and makes a sharp turn around the memorial. Speedy looks over and realizes the briefcase is gone. The van sweeps around again, and the back doors open up. The robed figure from earlier {Roland, unbeknownst to Speedy} tosses a bundle out on the street. As the van speeds away, Julie Mizuno and the other officers appear, guns blazing, and chase after the van. Speedy rushes over to the bundle. Wrapped in a few bed sheets is Polly. She's naked and drugged, but there are no signs of physical abuse.]

Speedy (frantic): Polly? Polly are you ok?

[Polly begins mumbling deliriously. She is completely whacked out.]

Speedy: Jesus, what did they give you?

Cpt. Mizuno [out of breath from trying to catch the van, and running back]: **puff** How is she? **gasp**

Speedy: I don't know. They doped her up on something. We need to get her to the hospital.

Cpt. Mizuno: Stay with her. I'll call an ambulance.

[Within moments, everyone is at the hospital. Francine, Guido, Lucille, and Big Al, are talking w/ the doctor.]

Doctor: Don't worry, she'll be fine. She's sustained some bruising around the wrists and ankles, and a needle mark on her neck, but that's about it. The kidnappers had her on a high dose of morphine, probably to keep her under control. Fortunately, she doesn't seem to have suffered from any long-term damage. She should be conscious shortly.

Guido: Knowing Polly, they probably needed enough to tranquilize an elephant. So then she can come home tomorrow?

Doctor: I didn't say that. Mrs. Cerviche has been almost completely inactive ever since she was kidnapped. It would probably be best for her to stay here for a few days.

Lucille: We understand doctor. We want what's best for Polly too.

Doctor: Thank you. Now if you'll excuse me, I have other patients to attend to.

[The doctor walks away. Cut to Polly's room. Speedy is laying on sheets on the bed, next to Polly. His hand is draped over her chest. Slowly she opens her eyes and turns her head towards him.]

Speedy (softly): You promised you'd make it back.

Polly (weak): I'm back, aren't I.

Speedy: I meant safely.

Polly: Oh. I'm sorry.

[Speedy grins at her, but a few tears are streaming down his face. Leaning forward, he kisses her on her forehead. By the time he's done, she's already asleep again. Speedy puts his head down on her pillow and is soon asleep himself.]

[Cut to a week later. Speedy is sitting with GB, talking.]

Speedy: GB, did you here in there was another robbery last night?

GB: Darn, not another cat burglary?

Speedy: Eh, I never liked the term "cat burglary". It sounds kind of discriminatory.

GB [chuckles]: I can understand why you feel that way. But seriously, how many is that now?

Speedy: Twelve in the past four days. We should probably talk to Francine about beefing up our security, especially after what happened to Polly. [looks around] By the way, where is Polly?

GB: I think she's talking with Francine about something or other.

[Speedy gets up and wanders around looking for Polly. As he walks towards the room that they share, he sees Francine standing outside the door. She has a look of disbelief on her face.]

Francine: Are you sure you want to do this, Polly?

Polly [voice from the other side of the door]: I thought you would appreciate this Fran. We'll probably double repeat business, at least with the male patrons.

Francine: True, but it just seems so... not like you.

Speedy [to Francine]: Hey, Fran. What's going on?

Francine: Oh, Polly's trying on a new waitress uniform.

Polly: Speedy, is that you?

Speedy: Yeah, it's me.

Polly: Oh, great. Thank goodness you're here. Let me ask you something. [She opens the door.] What do you think?

[Speedy's mouth hits the floor in record time. The new "uniform" that Polly is wearing looks like an ordinary red waitress uniform. The only thing is, the skirt is about two sizes too short, and the shirt leaves almost nothing to the imagination.]

Polly: That's just the reaction I'm looking for. [turns to Francine] You see what I told you?

[Francine just grins in disbelief and shakes her head. Polly walks past her shocked husband, into the restaurant area. Speedy, finally manages to return to his senses and follows her out.]

Speedy: Polly, what are you doing?

Polly [grabbing a notebook and pencil]: Well, Francine said that business has been a little slow lately. Plus I just felt like changing my wardrobe. [looks up at him] Why? I thought you liked it.

Speedy (quick): No, no, no. It's not that. It's just... I'm not really comfortable with you wearing that around a lot of people. [starts grinning] Now, if it were just the two of us in the privacy of our bedroom, then-

[The phone begins ringing, preventing Speedy from continuing the obviously pleasing {to both of them} scenario he's cooked up. Francine answers it.]

Francine: Samurai Pizza Cats, world famous heroes and world famous pizza! [Her smile quickly turned to a look of seriousness.] Oh, hi Big Al. [pause] Ninja Crows? What else is new? [pause] Ok, we'll check it out. Bye. [Hangs up the phone] Guys, we have eight Ninja Crows harassing vendors at the market place and stealing their stuff.

Guido: Fat Bunny's probably trying to lure us out again.

GB: Not necessarily. It's a relatively small platoon. Might just be a supply raid.

Polly: Even if it is, Don Costanza must need those supplies for a reason. If he's planning anything, this is our chance to find out what.

Speedy: Whatever the case, we should get moving. We won't learn anything just sitting around, and speculating. [Calls over to Jefferson Manx] Jeff, charge the cannon.

[Jefferson nods and punches some buttons on the cannon. GB prepares to fly off.]

GB [in the doorway]: I'll meet you there, as usual.

Polly: Just don't start the party without us, GB.

[GB smiles and nods. As he takes flight, the rest of the cats climb into the ovens. Cue the launch sequence.]

Speedy [to Francine, as they fly through the air]: Hey, Fran?

Francine: Yes, Speedy?

Speedy: Just out of curiosity, how good of a shot is your brother?

Guido [eyes narrow and tired looking]: Judging by the wall up ahead, not very good.

Polly [same, w/ an English accent]: Holmes, you astound me.

Speedy [bracing for the pain]: Oh, sh-

[They all slam into the wall before he can finish. GB looks on with a smirk on his face.]

GB: Fun ride guys?

Speedy [in great pain]: Oh yes, very much. I give it five stars.

Guido [same]: What a coincident. I'm SEEING five stars.

[They quickly spring to their feet as the Ninja Crows run by. The crows stop dead as they see the Pizza Cats.]

Crow 1: Ack! They're here!

Crow 2 [to Crow 1]: I thought you said they wouldn't bother sending the cats after us.

Speedy: Heh. Every time you Ninja Crows are out, something really bad starts attacking the city. We've learned to be cautious.

GB: We know you're just on a supply raid. Hell, back when I was a Ninja Crow I must've been on hundreds. We want to know what Fat Bunny is planning.

Crow 1: Drop dead, traitor!

GB [closing his eyes and smiling]: Make me.

[The young crow lets out a battle cry and leaps at GB. GB calmly swipes his sword at the young crow, making a huge gash in his armor. GB then delivers a powerful kick to the damaged armor, cracking it open like a walnut shell and knocking the Ninja Crow out.]

[The rest of the crows dash at the cats, determined to avenge their fallen comrade. They don't have much luck. Guido notices two crows rushing him from both sides, and jumps. The two crows slam into each other and are knocked out. Speedy duels with another crow for a very short time before bashing him in the head with the hilt of his sword. Polly completely decimates one crow with a heart bomb. Francine grabs her attacker by the neck, lifts him up, and smashes him in the stomach with her elbow until he throws up and collapses into a useless heap on the ground. GB leaps over another overzealous crow, grabs him by the shoulders, flips him around and tosses him into the ground. The last remaining crow decides that discretion is the better part of valor, and flees.]

Polly [running after the crow]: I got him!

[Polly pursues the crow through the streets, with the others trying to catch up. As they turn down another street, an overturned vending booth blocks Speedy and the others. GB flies over the booth and far ahead, while Speedy and the others climb over. Further down the street, Polly is helping GB stand up. GB is clearly dazed, and Polly is limping.]

Speedy: What the hell happened?

Polly [in pain]: I twisted my ankle and he got away. When I got here, GB was down.

GB [to Polly]: I don't remember passing you. But then again, pretty much the only thing I do remember is flying into a brick. The guy must've decked me as I was coming around the corner.

Speedy [to Polly]: How'd you twist your ankle?

Polly: Oh, I tripped over my own clumsy cat paw.

Speedy: Well, are you ok?

Polly: Yeah, I just need to walk it off. I'm sorry that guy got away.

Speedy: No problem. The important thing is you're all right.

Francine: Let's go back to the parlor. [to GB and Polly] We'll get some ice for you guys.

GB [still holding his head]: Sounds good to me.

[They begin walking back. Polly hangs back for a moment, watching them. A sinister grin spreads over her face.]

[Commercial Break]

[Cut to an overhead shot of the parlor interior as The Stranger by Billy Joel starts playing. Pan over the restaurant's interior as the quiet interlude at the beginning plays. When the interlude ends, Polly bursts out into the restaurant wearing her new uniform. As the vocals begin, the music fades into the background. Cut to a shot of Speedy and Guido, talking.]

Speedy: Hey Guido, is it just me or is Polly acting different lately?

Guido (dreamily) [staring at Polly, tongue hanging out]: I'll say.

[Speedy's eyes narrow suspiciously and he turns to Guido.]

Speedy (angrily): Hey! Stop oogling my wife! I'm asking for advice here, man!

Guido [shakes his head, snapping out of it]: Sorry man, I just can't stop looking at her in that uniform. Hell, that thing looks too small for Fran!

[Speedy nods and looks back at Polly. Suddenly his eyes bug out in shock. The camera quickly pans over to Polly, who is apparently flirting with a customer {a handsome young cat in a business suit}. Speedy marches over to try and find out what the heck is going on.]

Speedy: Polly, what the heck is going on? What's gotten into you?

Polly [leaning on the table, smiles at Speedy]: Oh, Speedy! Hey, I want to introduce you to a new friend.

Speedy [under his breath]: Some friend!

Chris [extending his hand]: The name's Logan. Chris Logan. You must be the famous, Speedy Cerviche.

Speedy [shaking his hand]: Yes, I am. I see you've already met my wife [stresses wife slightly], Polly.

[As he shakes Chris's hand, Speedy gets a slight tingling sensation traveling up and down his spine. He ignores it for the moment, but it none-the-less puts him ill at ease.]

Chris: Yes, I have. [glances back in Polly's direction] She's very lovely. You're a lucky man, Mister Cerviche.

Speedy [trying to remain polite]: Yes, don't I know it. Ah, pardon me but you don't seem familiar. Little Tokyo isn't actually very little, but it's small enough that I recognize most of our customers.

Chris: Well, actually I've just moved here.

Speedy [nodding]: Really?

Chris: Yes, I transferred here for business. Plan to really shake things up around here.

Speedy: I see. Well, I hope to see you around sometime.

Chris: Count on it. [Glances at Polly again.] I plan to eat most of my meals here.

Speedy [really struggling to remain polite]: Heh, really? That's great. [to Polly] Uh, honey can I see you for a moment?

[Speedy pulls Polly aside for a moment.]

Speedy: Alright Polly, I'm going to ask you one more time: What the heck is going on?

Polly: What's wrong?

Speedy: What's wrong is that that guy was looking at you like you were a filet mignion and he hadn't eaten in weeks!

Polly: So? I can take care of myself. You should know that better than anyone.

Speedy: Hey, I don't doubt that. The guy's a suit. He's probably never even seen a samurai sword. I was just wondering why you didn't deck him to begin with.

Polly: Are you saying I encouraged him?

Speedy: Not in those words, but you didn't do anything to rebuff him either.

Polly: I'm just trying to loosen up a bit. Maybe you should too. [turns away, annoyed] I don't like you when you're jealous.

[Speedy stares at her for a moment then "hmphs" in frustration. Angrily, he stomps back to Guido.]

Guido: So what happened? Did she tell you what's going on?

Speedy [still frustrated]: Not really. She just said she wanted to loosen up.

Guido: Well, she's certainly done that. Do you think she's trying to get into modeling again? The last time she tried that it really changed her.

Speedy: Nah, she hasn't said anything about that to me. Besides, this is a completely different change in personality.

[Guido nods. A yard or so away, Polly drops her pen. Guido, in spite of himself, begins leering as she bends to pick it up. Speedy responds by quickly and sharply driving his elbow into Guido's stomach. Guido's eyes bug out of his head, and he drops immediately to the ground.]

[Cut to later that night. The cats are closing up the parlor. The TV is on in the background. Polly hands Guido and Francine a glass of soda, and Speedy a bottle of water.]

Reporter: I'm here live with Little Tokyo Chief Security Officer Al Dente`, to discuss the recent rash of cat burglaries in the city. Big Al, it's such a pleasure to have you with us.

Big Al: Well, I'm delighted to be here, Pudding. I'm a very big fan of yours.

Pudding [flattered]: Oh, why thank you.

Guido [shouting over the television]: Hey, look! Big Al's on TV!

Francine [sipping her soda]: Cool! Turn it up.

[Guido turns up the volume.]

Big Al: -and I want to assure everyone that we are devoting our full resources to catching the criminal.

Pudding: That brings us to an interesting question: Is there any truth to the rumor that you will be bringing the Samurai Pizza Cats in on this case.

Speedy [gulping his water]: Huh! That's the first I've heard of that. [Polly shushes him.]

Big Al: Captain Mizuno and the officers under her command are fully qualified to handle this investigation. I think bringing in the Pizza Cats for the sole purpose of catching a common thief is a bit overkill. Besides, these rumors were circulated back when we had very little evidence to go on. But our culprit has become sloppy and careless: he or she left a partial fingerprint at the scene of the last heist. Our forensics department is studying the print now, and we expect to have a suspect within the next day or two.

[Francine yawns suddenly, and blinks her eyes heavily.]

Guido: Is something wrong, Fran?

Francine: I don't know. I'm really tired all of the sudden.

Speedy [yawning also]: Yeah, me too.

Jefferson: Are you guys punking out?

[Both Speedy and Francine glare at him, but are too tired to confront him.]

Polly [consolingly]: Why don't you guys get some sleep. We'll clean up the rest of this mess.

Jefferson (slyly): Yeah, don't worry about it Speedy. Polly and I'll take care of business.

[Very calmly, Polly raises a fist and smashes it into Jefferson's face. Jeff soars through the air, impacting on the far wall and making a third imprint on it right next to the other two.]

Guido [wincing, looking at the imprints]: We should really fill those in.

Speedy: <That's more like the Polly I know.> Thanks, Pol. I think I will get some sleep.

Francine: Me too. Someone call GB's house to see how he's feeling. He did get bashed in the head after all.

Guido: No prob, Fran.

Polly: I hope you feel better soon, Speedy. I promise I won't be long.

[She grins seductively at him. Speedy grins back at her, and walks into their room. He's out as soon as his head hits the pillow.]

[The next morning Speedy slowly wakes up. He rolls over to hug Polly... and realizes she's not there. Bolting awake, he searches in the bathroom, in the closet, under the bed, in the dresser drawers, even under the bed lamp, and does not find her. Trying to keep his cool, he dashes out to the restaurant where the others are already gathered.]

Speedy: Has anybody seen Polly?

Guido: You mean she wasn't with you?

Speedy [slightly annoyed]: Would I be asking you if she was with me?

Francine: Calm down, Speedy. I'm sure that she's fine

Speedy: Well she wouldn't just disappear like this.

Francine: Will you relax? She's fine, you're just over reacting because of that kidnapping scare a few weeks ago.

Speedy [calming down slightly]: Maybe your right, Fran.

[Speedy makes breakfast and gets ready for work, but he's still disturbed by Polly's absence. GB arrives for work, and still no Polly. Finally, Speedy starts getting worried again.]

Speedy [worried sick]: Where the heck is she? We should call Big Al, again.

GB: Doesn't a person need to be missing for more than 48 hours before they're declared missing?

Guido: Well, last time Big Al put people on the case right away.

Jefferson: Cool, we're VIPs.

Guido: Shut up.

Francine: Calm down, guys. Arguing isn't going to help.

Speedy: I knew we should've beefed up security.

Francine: Speedy, are you sure Polly didn't go to bed last night.

Speedy: I couldn't say one way or the other Fran, I was out like a light.

Francine: Guido, do you remember what Polly did after you two got done cleaning up?

Guido (agitated): No, I fell asleep right after you guys did. Look, what difference does it make? She obviously went out after we all went to bed.

[Francine is about to get in his face, but the phone rings. She picks it up and listens for a while. Her face goes white with shock. Eventually she hangs up the phone.]

GB: What's wrong, Fran?

Francine [stunned]: Big Al said the police found Polly. They placed her under arrest for possession of stolen property.

Speedy (disbelieving): What?!

Francine: They said she's the cat burglar.

[Cut to Big Al's office]

Speedy: This is ridiculous! Al, you know Polly would never do anything like this!

Big Al [takes a sip of tea]: Believe me Speedy, I'm just as shocked and horrified as you are, but the evidence is undeniable. Polly was found with the items from last night's robbery in her possession.

Speedy [irate]: What are you, sick? That doesn't prove anything! The real burglar could've planted that stuff on her.

Big Al [hands the Speedy and the others a copy of a report]: You know that fingerprint I said we found on the news? We ran it through the database. It matches Polly's perfectly.

Speedy: You guys found this at Mr. Winkle's place? He's one of our biggest customers. Polly delivers there all the time.

Big Al: Does she go through the window? That's where we found it. Plus, we found blood on some glass shards at last night's robbery. Polly has a cut on her left foot, and the blood is her type.

Speedy: Look, all I see here is a few semi-convincing pieces of circumstantial evidence. It'll never hold up in court.

GB [whispering to Guido]: Why's he talking like a defense lawyer all of the sudden?

Guido: He's seen virtually every episode of Law & Order.

Speedy: What about motive? What possible reason could Polly have for stealing.

Big Al [takes deep breath and pauses for a moment]: Drugs.

Speedy: WHAT?! You gotta be kidding me! You know Polly never used drugs.

Big Al: Speedy, we found her in a cheap motel, high on morphine. You could practically smell it a mile away. She probably got addicted when her kidnappers kept her doped up.

Speedy [fed up, walking out]: I don't have to take this. I'm not going to listen to this crap.

Big Al: Look Speedy, we're prepared to offer Polly special consideration for her years of dedicated service-

Speedy [continuing out]: Get bent, Al.

[Big Al begins getting angry, but Speedy is already out the door. The others soon follow him.]

Speedy: Man, can you guys believe what he was saying about Polly?

[The others look at each other nervously, but don't say anything. Speedy turns and looks at them in disbelief.]

Speedy: Aw, come on! You don't seriously think she had anything do with this?

Francine: Well, they do have a pretty strong case against her. And even you said she was acting differently.

GB: She's right, Speedy. Big Al's theory isn't so far fetched-

Speedy [aggravated]: This whole day is unbelievable! You guys are as crazy as Emperor Fred if you think Polly had anything to do with this.

Guido: Well, what do you think is going on, Speedy?

Speedy: I think that someone is out to frame Polly. Probably the same people who kidnapped her to begin with.

Jefferson: You've been watching too much X-Files, man.

GB: Come on, Speedy. There's nothing more we can do.

Speedy [calmer]: No, you guys go on back to the parlor. I need some time to think.

[The others nod and walk away. Cut to Polly's cell. She's sitting on the bed, and it looks like she's been crying. She looks up and a security guard is standing outside.]

Guard: Mrs. Cerviche? You have a visitor.

Polly [wipes away some tears]: Thank you, Ed.

[She sees Speedy walk up and runs up to meet him. She hugs him through the bars, and he kisses her on the forehead.]

Speedy: How you holding up?

Polly: Well the food at home is better. [She smiles and Speedy chuckles] Are the others here?

Speedy [uneasy]: Uh, no. They went back to the parlor. [Polly looks disappointed.] Polly... They think you're guilty.

[Polly stares at him blankly for a moment, then brakes down into tears again.]

Polly [bitterly]: What about you? Do you think I did it?

Speedy: Of course not! You know me better than that. [pauses] But it doesn't look good. Big Al has a pile of evidence against you. Plus you had been acting rather weird since the kidnapping.

Polly: What are you talking about? I haven't been back to the parlor since I made that delivery.

Speedy [confused]: Excuse me?

Polly: Remember the delivery you told me not to make? You were right, I shouldn't have gone. I played right into their hands.

Speedy: So, you don't remember anything that happened since that night?

Polly: No. After the guy in the cloak and his pet bull knocked me out, the next thing I remember is the Police slapping cuffs on me.

Speedy [thinks for a moment]: Do you still remember that address?

Polly: Yeah, why?

Speedy [smiling]: I'm gonna do a little P.I. work for you.

[Polly smiles back and hugs him. Cut to later, on the street where Polly was abducted. Speedy observes it from across the street.]

Speedy: <Well, this is the spot, but I don't see anything suspi->

[He ducks behind a corner as a group of Ninja Crows approach the building. After watching them enter, Speedy rushes back to the building and peaks through the door. He sees a circular platform appear under the crows and lower them into the ground. When they finally disappear, Speedy approaches the spot.]

Speedy: <It's nearly impossible to spot. No wonder the police missed it!>

[Speedy steps on the spot, and the platform lowers into the murky depths. Stepping off, Speedy keeps to the shadows and looks around. He sees Cheese's enormous hi-tech laboratory. He gapes in awe.]

Speedy [awe]: Whoa. What is this place? [He looks around a little more, and eventually spots the master of the domain.] Cheese!

[Behind Speedy, a figure lurks in the shadows. Lurching forward, it slams a brick into Speedy's head. Speedy falls to the ground, unconscious. Beside his head steps a black, high heeled leather boot. A feminine voice chuckles evilly.]

[Commercial Break]

[Speedy is unconscious, tied by his hands and feet to a large metal wheel on the wall. His helmet is missing, and he's bare-chested. Slowly he opens his eyes. In front of him stands a female cat in a leather dominatrix outfit. She's stretching a whip in her hands, and looks very eager to whip him into submission. By far the most disturbing thing about her, however, is that she looks exactly like Polly.]

Speedy [slightly nervous]: Hi, Polly. Look, I like a little sexual role-playing as much as the next guy, but I didn't know you were into anything this extreme.

Andry: I hate to disappoint you, Speedy, but you have the wrong Polly. You can call me Polly Andry.

Speedy: Cute name. I take it you were the one my friends and I were hosting at the pizza parlor instead of Polly?

Andry: Looks and brains. I can see what my dear mother sees in you.

Speedy: Uh, you look a bit old to be Polly's daughter. I'd say more like a twin sister.

Andry: Well, we have a very complex relationship, your wife and I.

Speedy [taking a wild guess]: You're a clone, aren't you?

[Polly Andry lashes the whip straight at Speedy, leaving a bright red welt on his shoulder.]

Andry (furious): I ask the questions, knave! Now, what are you doing here?

Speedy [wincing in pain]: Wrong address on a Pizza delivery.

Andry [whipping him again]: Why are you here? Tell me!

[Speedy refuses to talk. Andry whips him again and again and again. Finally, the door opens and Big Cheese walks in.]

Andry [bowing before him]: Master Cheese.

BC (annoyed): What is he doing here? I thought I told you, no guests.

Andry: It couldn't be helped. I found him snooping about the laboratory, so I decided to bring him to my playroom. I've been trying to get him to tell me why he's here, but he's so stubborn.

BC (sympathetic): I know exactly how you feel, my dear. If I had to guess, I'd say he's trying to prove that his beloved Polly is innocent.

Speedy [taunting BC]: What's wrong, Cheese? Running out of ideas? I mean, trying to replace Polly with an evil clone just seems a little uninspired, even for you.

[His remark angers Andry more than it does Seymour. Enraged, she quickly tosses her dagger at him. It lands right between Speedy's legs, coming dangerously close to a very sensitive area.]

Speedy: **YELP!** (weakly) Cowabunga!

Cheese [chuckles in amusement]: Laugh all you want, Cerviche. The fact remains that thanks to my little girl here, we are closer than ever to defeating the Samurai Pizza Cats.

Speedy [scoffs]: In your dreams!

Cheese: Hey, it's true. Miss Andry is a perfect duplicate of your dear wife. She has all her strength, all her speed, all her moves and all her memories. And without the real Polly to oppose her, your friends are at a significant disadvantage.

Speedy: So that's why you had her frame Polly. To take her out of the picture so that we'd be weakened when you guys attacked with Andry.

BC: Partly, yes. Also we needed financing. After all, training is expensive.

Speedy (confused): Training?

[As if on cue, the door opens again. In walk Jerry Atric, Roland Crow, and a regiment of Ninja Crows.]

Roland: Well, well, well. If it isn't the great Speedy Cerviche.

Speedy: Nice to see you too, Roland.

BC: Jerry, how are the preparations coming?

Jerry: We're ready to strike in about an hour. [glances at Speedy] Are you sure it's safe to discuss such things around him?

BC: Why not? There's nothing he can do about it. The only thing he's good for now is as a playmate for our little girl.

Andry [leaning in close to Speedy] (purring): Oh yes. We're going to have lots of fun together.

Speedy: Sorry, I prefer originals to cheap imitations.

[Andry snarls at him and slashes his chest with her steel tipped claws. Speedy groans in pain. Andry turns the wheel so that Speedy is upside down.]

Andry [rabid]: I'll teach you some respect, knave. Call me mistress! Worship me!

Speedy [blood rushing to his head]: The only one Iíll worship... is Polly Esther...

[Andry begins whipping him again. And again. And again. And again. She whips him repeatedly and lets out a sadistic, maniacal laugh, clearly enjoying her work. Finally, from the combined trauma of being upside down and being whipped repeatedly, he passes out. Andry steps back, panting excitedly.]

Roland [sweat drops] (unnerved): She's, uh... zealous.

BC [grinning]: You have no idea.

Andry [very pleased with herself]: Well, doesn't look like he'll be going anywhere for a while.

Jerry: Don't be too sure, my dear. We are dealing with the infamous Speedy Cerviche after all.

Roland: I'll make sure he stays right here.

BC: Good idea, Roland.

Andry: Well, let's get going. I'm looking forward to playing with the rest of the Pizza Cats.

[Chuckling to themselves, Andry, Cheese and Atrick leave. The camera zooms in on Speedy's unconscious body, slowly fading to black.]

[The camera fades up on the same room. Speedy is now upright again, and slowly coming to his senses. It's about half an hour later. Jerry, Andry, and BC are gone. Roland is sitting on a chair in front of Speedy. Seeing Speedy awaken, he grins evilly.]

Roland: I'll bet you don't feel so superior now, do you cat?

Speedy [chuckling slightly]: Funny, that's exactly what Bad Bird said to me the last time he had me in a position like this.

Roland: Well, if you're expecting me to get all noble and let you go, you are sorely mistaken my friend.

Speedy: Oh, I wouldn't even think it. I'm gonna get out of this mess on my own.

Roland: Sorry, it ain't gonna happen.

[Speedy continues talking, hoping to distract Roland while he tries to slide his right hand out of its restraint.]

Speedy: Good will always triumph over evil, Roland.

Roland: You're fooling yourself, Ceviche. There's no escape this time.

Speedy: Heh, that's what you think. I'm gonna break free right now!

Roland: Don't bet on it, fleabag.

[Roland walks over to tighten the restraints. Speedy head butts him and he staggers forward, stunned. Speedy finally frees his hand, and punches Roland right in the face. As Roland falls unconscious, Speedy grabs the keys from his belt and frees himself. After chaining Roland up in his place, Speedy makes his way out of the base. Along the way he encounters a few Ninja Crows, but he manages to dispatch them without much difficulty.]

[Cut back to the jail. Polly is sitting in her cell, looking very depressed. Suddenly she hears a tapping at her window. She looks out it, and sees Speedy.]

Polly: Speedy, what are you doing here?

Speedy: Polly, get on the floor and cover your head. I'll explain everything on the way.

Polly (confused): On the way...

[Realizing what he means, Polly crouches down and covers her head. Outside, Speedy goes into his Cat's Eye Slash sequence. The blast hits the wall, ripping a hole in her cell. The alarm instantly goes off.]

Polly [upset]: Are you out of your mind?! What the hell are you doing?!

Speedy: I found out who was responsible for the cat burglaries. We need to get to the Pizza Parlor, quickly.

Royal Guard 1 [off camera]: There they are! Don't let them get away!

[Speedy turns to face the guards. There are five of them. Taking Polly's hand he leaps into the air, high over their heads. He tosses a couple of Ginzu Stars at them, which explode and knock them unconscious. As Speedy and Polly continue to make their escape, more Royal Guards pursue them. Speedy manages to best each of them in one on one combat, knocking them out with the hilt of his sword. As the last batch of guards pursues them, Speedy tosses a few smoke bombs to evade them.]

[Sometime later, as Speedy and Polly race back to the Pizza Parlor...]

Polly: So, Big Cheese created Polly Andry to impersonate and frame me to weaken the Pizza Cats for his final assault?

Speedy: Essentially, yes. I think he figures you're the strongest member of our team. Personally, I don't think he's that far off.

Polly [smiles]: Well, thank you dear.

Speedy: The only thing I can't figure out is why he needed money to train the Ninja Crows. I mean you remember how much he was willing to pay the Rude Noise to get rid of us, right?

Polly: Well, Cheese isn't exactly known for his wise investment strategies. He did manage to blow the whole city's treasury on his evil schemes.

Speedy: That's true.

Polly: Also, that lab you described must've cost a fortune. He probably went into debt to build that thing. That would also explain why he had the Ninja Crows making supply runs.

Speedy: I think you're right. [pauses, thinking] He must've had Andry dope us up when he heard the police were on to the cat burglar. That gave Andry plenty of time to sneak out and help them set you up.

Polly: Exactly. [pauses] How much time until the attack?

Speedy: We've got just under 10 minutes. The parlor is still about 5 minutes away.

Polly: We're going to get there too early.

Speedy: Relax. Everything will be ok.

[Cut to the parlor. Guido, Francine, GB, Carla, and Jefferson are sitting around, waiting very worriedly.]

Jefferson: Look, there's no reason to jump to any conclusions. He and Polly are probably just having a conjugal visit.

[Francine and Carla glare at him. GB and Guido wince at the image.]

Jefferson [genuinely confused]: What?

[At that moment, the doors burst open and Speedy and Polly rush in. The others are surprised to say the least.]

Guido [disbelief]: What the- Polly, what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in jail?

Polly: Speedy busted me out.

Francine [incredulous]: Are you two insane? Why on earth did you come here? This is the first place Big Al will look when he hears the news.

Speedy: That's the point. Guys, Polly is innocent and I have proof.

GB: You do? Show us!

Speedy: Well... I don't have it with me. It's on its way here actually.

Francine: This is nuts. Do you have any idea what a standoff like this will do to business?


Carla [nervously]: Guys, maybe you should just go along with them?

Speedy: We just need another 4 minutes, Carla.

[Outside Police have the parlor surrounded. Big Al walks over to talk to Captain Mizuno.]

Cpt. Mizuno: They're not gonna come out, Al. We should go in.

Big Al: I don't want to turn the Pizza Cat into a war zone, Julie.

Cpt. Mizuno: So, we're just going to sit here until they decide to give up? That doesn't seem wise, Sir.

Big Al: Relax, Captain. We're going to give them 2 minutes. Then we'll go in and convince them to surrender.

[Back inside...]

Guido: What are they waiting for, an engraved invitation?

Speedy: Nah, they're probably just trying to sweat us out.

Carla: I hope they don't try psychological warfare.

Polly: Me neither. Last time they tried that, they blasted Britney Spears at max volume into the guy's home.

Jefferson: What's wrong with Britney Spears?

GB [glaring at him]: You have a dirty mind.

Jefferson, Francine, and Guido: DUH!

Polly: How much time is left Speedy?

Speedy [looks at the clock]: Just under 3 minutes.

Francine: Great. What happens then?

Speedy: Just get ready to fight.

[At that moment, the police burst through the doors. Two policemen grab Speedy and Polly, and attempt to handcuff them.]

Captain Mizuno: Speedy Cerviche, you're under arrest for aiding and abetting in the escape of a criminal. You have the right to remain silent-

Speedy: I choose to waive that right. [Starts screaming]

Big Al [covering his ears]: Damn, I never knew the boy had a set of lungs like that!

Polly [struggling against the Policeman]: Hey, not so tight! Come on, let me go!

Speedy [now screaming coherently]: Big Al, you've got to listen to me! Polly's innocent, Big Cheese set her up! I have proof! Just wait another 2 minutes! They're coming! Just give us another-

[And at that point Andry, Tauros, and several Ninja Crows blast their way into the parlor. Everyone in the parlor turns towards the explosion, alarmed.]

Speedy: You're early.

Andry: My watch is fast.

Big Al [gulps]: Speedy, do you know who this is?

Speedy: Big Al, meet Polly Andry. She's Seymour's latest henchperson. She framed Polly.

Andry: He's right, Al. I admit it. I did it all.

Cpt. Mizuno [approaches her]: Men, place her under arrest.

[The police officers, however, seem mesmerized by Andry. They don't budge.]

Cpt. Mizuno: Come on! What's wrong with all of you?

Andry: Sex pheromones, honey. A little gift from Masters Cheese and Atrick. Your officers cannot lift a finger to harm me.

Cpt Mizuno (annoyed) [to herself]: I guess I'll have to do this myself. [to Andry] Polly Andry, I place you under arrest for burglary. You have the right to-

[At that moment, Andry grabs Julie by her shirt and kisses her right on the lips. The whole rest of the parlor looks on in shock.]

Polly: Damn. I'm so evil and skanky, and I think I'm a little gay.

[Andry releases a very stunned, and somewhat flushed Julie.]

Andry [to Julie]: Give it a rest.

[With that Andry tosses Julie into the air. She slams down into a table, and is knocked unconscious. The police suddenly snap out of their spell.]

Big Al: Get them!

[The Ninja Crows manage to defeat a number of police before the Pizza Cats make short work of them. Guido goes after Tauros, and proves to be to quick for the robotic bull. After taking numerous hits from Guido's sword, Tauros begins to show signs of wear and tear. Guido finally finishes him off with a blast from the sunspot.

[Turning towards the remaining police Andry cracks her whip, creating a series of sonic booms that knock them over and out like bowling pins. Big Al unsheathes his sword to try and fight her, but she backflip tosses him into the ground.]

Andry: Later, old man.

GB: Grrr. You're going down!

[GB flies towards Andry, sword ready. Andry lashes her whip around his neck, and swings. GB screams as his face collides with a wall, and he slumps to the ground.]

Carla: BIRDIE!

[She dashes towards GB to see if he's ok. Andry grabs her and tosses her into the wall. Carla slumps down beside GB.]

Guido [rushing forward]: Take this you monster!

[Guido slashes his sword at Andry, but Andry leaps out of the way. He slashes at her again, but she entangles his sword with her whip and pulls it out of his grasp. She high kicks him in the face and he goes down. She whips him several times, pulls him up and tosses him into a wall.]

Francine: Guido!

[Francine runs over to Guido, but is caught by Andry. Andry lifts her off the ground by her neck.]

Jefferson: Fran!

[He dashes over to help her, but Andry lifts him off the ground by his neck too.]

Andry [to Jefferson]: I'm gonna have some fun with you later, you horny little pervert.

[She then slams his head into Francine's knocking them both out.]

Speedy: Enough! Andry, I'm the one you want.

Andry: In more ways than one, sugar. [cracks her whip]

Speedy: Oh, no you don't. Put that thing away. Let's do this fairly. Sword to sword.

Andry [smiling]: Of course. I should've known that's how you'd want to do it. Fine. Sword to sword it is.

[Andry throws down her whip and twirls around. When she faces Speedy again she's holding a samurai sword.]

Speedy [gulps]: Where were you hiding that?

[Smiling, Andry rushes forward and attacks Speedy. Speedy parries her first strike, then her second, and then her third before finally being able to counterstrike. Andry parries his blows easily. She moves like a whirlwind, knicking him occasionally. Feinting, she slashes a large gash in his armor. He staggers and she elbows him in the stomach. Speedy doubles up on the ground, and Andry kicks him in the face. She puts the sword at his throat, and suddenly feels one at hers.]

Polly: Toss it away. [Andry refuses. Polly presses her sword harder against her throat.] Do it!

[Andry tosses the sword away and turns around.]

Andry [seeing it is Polly]: Oh, it's you. For a moment there I was actually worried.

Polly: Cute. How about we settle this.

Andry [chuckles for a moment]: Oh, you're serious? Very well then.

[Polly Esther and Polly Andry assume fighting stances and then rush at each other. For a while they are fairly evenly matched, each one parrying the other's blows. Then Andry slowly begins to gain the edge, her ferocity wearing Polly down.]

Andry [maniacal laugh]: Give up, girl. The best you can hope for is a draw.

Polly: Is that a challenge?

[Polly begins fighting back with equal ferocity and determination. Slowly she begins to dominate. This flusters Andry immensely, and she loses even more ground to Polly. More and more of Polly's strikes seem to evade Andry's defenses, as Andry's frustration makes her more and more vulnerable.]

Andry (panicking): No! You can't win! I won't let you!

Polly [determined]: That's right. You won't. I'll do it myself.

Andry [pushes her away] (enraged): I'm going to kill you if it's the last thing I do! [She begins her finishing move, which appears similar to Polly's except it's jet-black, and crackling with dark energy.] DARK HEART AWAY!

[Polly retaliates by going into her own finisher. The two moves collide and explode, releasing a fantastic amount of energy. When the smoke clears, Andry is on the ground in a bloody heap. Her black leather outfit is cut in forty different places. She is alive, but very badly injured. Polly, miraculously, escaped the blast mostly unharmed.]

[Polly walks over to Speedy and helps him up.]

Polly: Are you ok?

Speedy: I'll live...

[Big Al groans as he wakes up.]

Speedy: Al! Are you ok?

Big Al: Yeah... I'm fine. [walks over to Andry] Hmph. Old man. Thanks a lot.

Speedy: So, I guess Polly is free now, Al?

Big Al: Huh? Oh yes, of course. [Picks up Andry] Well, I guess I ought to go lock the real cat burglar up. [glares at Speedy] That is if I can find a section of the jail you didn't blow up, Speedy!

Speedy [sheepish]: Eh, I'm sorry about that Al!

Big Al [walking off]: Hmph. The Princess won't be happy about that. Someone's getting sent to Prisoner's Island for sure.

[Speedy and Polly look at each other and shrug. Cut to the next day. The parlor has been repaired, for the most part, and everything is almost back to normal.]

Guido [all bandaged up, talking to Speedy]: Hey, Speedy. You all right?

Speedy [also bandaged]: Yeah, I'm fine. You?

Guido: I'll be ok. [calls over to Polly] Hi, Polly.

[Polly is waiting on tables, and she has no bandages on. She ignores Guido.]

Guido [to Speedy]: So, how long is she going to be like this

Speedy: Well, cut her a break! I mean, you guys were supposed to be her friends and you just abandoned her.

Guido: We tried to apologize, but she won't even listen to us. I don't want her to be mad at me for the rest of our lives over this.

Speedy: I'll talk to her about it, ok. But, that's it.

[Guido nods and Speedy heads off to talk to Polly. He finds her in their room, sitting on the bed.]

Speedy: Hey, Polly? Guido wanted me to tell you he's sorry again.

Polly (bitter): I don't have anything to say to Guido, or anyone else for that matter.

Speedy: Oh, come on Polly. How long are you going to stay mad at them?

Polly (annoyed): I don't know, Speedy. I want to forgive them, but I think I need some time away from them first. Just to work things out.

Speedy: I understand. [pauses] Hey, why don't we spend the weekend in the next village? That way we can relax, enjoy ourselves and not worry about any awkward moments with the others.

Polly (smiles): That sounds nice. You deal with Francine, I'll pack.

[Speedy nods and walks out of the room, while Polly gets out the suitcase. Cut to the jail. Andry is sitting in her cell, when a guard comes along and unlocks the door.]

Guard: Ok lady, you made bail. Get moving.

[Andry makes her way to the front of the jail, where she claims her things. Outside, she meets the man who posted bail.]

BC: Good to see you again, my dear.

Andry [drops to her knees]: Forgive me, Master Cheese. I have failed you.

BC: Calm yourself, my dear. We shall do better next time. There is more than one way to skin a Samurai Pizza Cat.

[With that Cheese and Andry walk out into the street, Andry stretching her whip as she walks. Cut to an over head shot of them walking through the streets of Little Tokyo. Cue the piano solo of The Stranger by Billy Joel. Fade out.]

In the next episode of SPC: New Millenium:

Seven [said over footage of a young bunny girl getting teased at school]: As an old song says, you can't hurry love. Whenever it happens, it happens, and until then you have to be patient. This comes as small consolation to Naomi Hellstrome, a freshman at Little Tokyo High School. She is intelligent, sensitive, shy, and lovesick: In short, she's the type of girl who is always over looked by the guys and teased by the less sensitive girls.

[Cut to a seen of the girl hunched over an operating table, building a replicant (alive-looking robot) of a guy bunny her age.]

Seven: Deciding to take matters into her own hands, Naomi builds her own boyfriend: A tall, dark, and handsome bunny aptly named Robby. [Cut to a battle between the Pizza Cats and Ninja Crows. A Ninja Crow is holding Naomi hostage. Robby grabs the crow and tosses him the length of three football fields. Shot of Robby standing in front of Don Costanza.] Their life of bliss is short lived, however, when Robby's true nature is revealed to Don "Fat Bunny Costanza who decides to recruit the misguided bioroid.

[Cut to a scene of a fully cybernetic Robby {who resembles the armored Mewtwo with bunny ears} savaging the town.]

Seven: When Fat Bunny begins to use Robby in his latest evil scheme, Naomi realizes only the Samurai Pizza Cats can save the town and recover her bionic boyfriend. [Shot of Polly arguing with a young female cat with pink hair.] Unfortunately the cats have problems of their own when their newest employee, Polly's kid sister Ruth, insists on joining them in the crime fighting biz.

Can the Pizza Cats save the day with out breaking Naomi's heart? Will Ruth become a full-fledged Samurai Pizza Cat without getting killed by her sister? Find out next time in Episode 3: Love and Technology on Samurai Pizza Cats: New Millenium

Guest Voices

Cpt. Julie Mizuno- Susan Roman

Pudding- Tress MacNeille

Chirs Logan- Kevin Kline


Regular Cast Voices

Speedy Cerviche/ GB/ Meowzma O'Tool- Rick Jones

Guido Anchovy/ Spritz T. Cat/ Bat Cat/ Jerry Atric- Terrance Scammel

Polly Esther/ Polly Andry- Sonja Ball

Francine/ Carla- Pauline Little

Al Dente`/ General Catton- A.J. Henderson

Princess Violet/Lucille Omitsu- Susanne Glover

Seymour "Big Cheese" Cheese- Dean Hagopian

Don "Fat Bunny" Costanza- Ted Lewis

Elliot Durly- John Mahoney

Roland Crow- Jake Busey

Josie Omitsu- Jackie Farrel

Jefferson Manx- Ted McGinley